worn_wings | ➶ ][ driftfleet ic inbox

Wish I knew. Kinda wished they hadn't. [ Because this? Coming back? It sucks, and now he really has no where else to go. ]

[ He just... shakes his head. Impossible. ]

I don't know how long we'll be stuck here, but..yeah.

I'm sorry for...what happened. [ He chokes on the last bit. It's hard to get out, to accept that he got people killed. ]

Jesus.

[ What the fuck does Carl have to feel sorry for, he died. It's not on him, anything that happened after. It's on them for not getting there in time.

Maybe this is just-- maybe he's losing his mind. Seeing ghosts. ]

Don't gotta be.

I panicked.

[ It's not like him. He wasn't this panicked at home- back home, he had a plan, and there was suddenly no time. ]

Should have just stayed on the ship.. at least it would have been contained.

What the hell happened?

[ That's the part he really doesn't get. Not that he really expects an answer, unless this is real, in which case... well, what the hell did happen?! ]

[ It's harder to lie like this, even harder to lie to Daryl. He tried with Maggie when he called her before everything happened, but he thinks she saw through that. Knew better, maybe. Carl frowns, resting his head against the wall behind him. He's so fucking tired. ]

It just happened.

[ That doesn't make any sense, and they both know it. Daryl's flat stare says as much-- sorry, kid. He's not buying it. ]

Somethin started it.

[ He sighs wearily, not looking at Daryl. ]

Then you know what started it.

[ Really, he feels like he doesn't know anything.

This doesn't seem like a productive line of conversation, though. If this is real, Carl's not gonna wanna relive it. ]

You really alright?

[ Give or take. He's probably not really okay. Who could be? ]

[ He offers a smile that doesn't quite reach its mark. ]

Sorta.

[ Not really at all. ]

[ About what he expects. On the other hand, he's talking and probably not craving human flesh, which is actually a literal fucking miracle so how bad can it be? ]

Maggie know?

I let her know first. Didn't really talk to her face to face.

[ Because she would worry and ask questions, and Carl's not sure how much he can handle of that right now. There's... a lot to process. ]

[ Not quite trusting himself to speak, he nods. It's good, Maggie should know. He should-- well, they should talk about it, but what the hell are they gonna say?

After a moment, he steadies, careful. ]

Anything we can do?

Not really? Sorry.. I'm not being very helpful.

[ Not really anything any of them can do while he's on the Marsiva. ] Mostly I'm just really tired.

Nothin to be sorry about. Just get some rest.

A little easier said than done, but I'm trying.

Yeah.

[ He breathes out, slow, not quite a sigh but awful close. He'd like to say something worthwhile, something that'd make a difference-- but he's pretty sure there isn't anything. ]

Will you.. keep an eye on Maggie? Until I get back? I know I made things harder for her.

Yeah. 'Course.

[ He pauses, not quite sure what to say, but-- ]

'M glad... [ Aloud, it sounds fucking idiotic. Hey, the thing where you're not dead? That's great! Jesus. ] I'm just glad.

[ Fuck.

Exhibit A: why Daryl doesn't like talking about feelings. Sorry, Carl. ]

[ Welp. There it is, Daryl. A genuine smile. It's small and goes away quickly, but you did it. ]

Thanks, Daryl.

[ It leaves him feeling... better, sort of, but also vaguely embarrassed. ]

No problem.

[ And with an awkward nod, he cuts the feed off there, before he ends up feeling even stupider about something. ]

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